363: 🌈 Taking a Quiet Sabbatical and Pausing the Podcasts — For Now . . .

Interactive Transcript

spk_0 What's next?

spk_0 This is a question we're all having to ask and answer more frequently.

spk_0 I'm Jenny Blake, your host of the Pivot Podcast, and author of Pivot.

spk_0 The only move that matters is your next one.

spk_0 For show notes from this episode, visit pivotmethod.com slash podcast.

spk_0 If change is the only constant, then let's get better at it.

spk_0 Here we go.

spk_0 Welcome back friends. This is a joint episode for pivot and free time because I'm making a bittersweet announcement, which is that I'm pausing the podcast indefinitely.

spk_0 Now, I don't have it in me to say I'm closing them or shutting them down because I really have no clue what the fate of them will be, but I do know for sure that it's time to take a little break in today's episode.

spk_0 I'll share a little context how I reached this decision through a combination of a download in the park and some conversations with friends as we turn the corner into the ninth year of podcasting.

spk_0 I really want to say thank you and also get into some of the business reasons behind it for those of you who are curious, just how the math maths or doesn't.

spk_0 And then some ideas about what's next, even though I have no clue and that is part of what I'm calling my quiet sabbatical that starts now as I pause these podcasts.

spk_0 I encourage you to stay subscribed because I will not be able to resist having conversations with friends hitting record and even doing more live events and live tapings for paying subscribers at substack.

spk_0 So if you want to join any of my three substacks and keep in touch if you're not already visit substack.com slash at Jenny Blake and there you can stay in the loop on pivot list twice a month.

spk_0 Time well spent that's the free time newsletter that goes out three to four times a month and then rolling in dough, which is where I talk about all my defined disaster diaries of my 13th year now of running a small creative business.

spk_0 You can hear even as I record this, but I have a little cold my throat's a little scratchy.

spk_0 I got COVID a year ago after making it through three years in New York City, riding subways, being exposed to people, I'll walk in with rider and ever since then it triggered my childhood asthma that you've probably heard me event about on the show before.

spk_0 My asthma came back actually much worse than ever was when I was a kid where it was waking me up multiple times a night.

spk_0 And finally after three months I stubbornly saw a pulmonologist, she prescribed a steroid inhaler and that has been miraculous in terms of being able to breathe again and sleep through the night, but it's affecting my voice.

spk_0 And so weirdly for the last year as I was getting more and more confused about what my business wanted to become, I was also losing my voice physically it was becoming a little more tricky to record episodes.

spk_0 Now I wouldn't have let that get in my way per se, but I'm also somebody that really listens to the somatic signals that my body is giving me.

spk_0 And for the few years prior it was raging ear infections, so my inquiry was what am I not hearing and then losing my voice also sparked something what am I not saying or what do I need to say or do differently.

spk_0 I was having a conversation with my friend Natalie Lou at Dumbo House in Brooklyn when she was visiting from the UK.

spk_0 Natalie's been a guest on both pivot and free time.

spk_0 And she recently made the courageous decision to shut down her podcast.

spk_0 She's been building a platform online for 18 years and the baggage reclaim sessions, which was her show.

spk_0 She said that one day she thought maybe it's time to wrap this up and that that thought alone let her know yes indeed it was time and instead of picking some beautiful round number and recording 20 30 40 more episodes.

spk_0 She just said I'll record one more and I'm done.

spk_0 Something about that conversation stuck with me and as I got to the end of 2023, which was another really tough year business wise.

spk_0 I realized that I had gone all in on these podcasts for two years.

spk_0 I hired an incredible production team, one stone creative.

spk_0 We produced 14 episodes a month across my two shows plus the private feed for BFF and it was even a recurring guest host on my friend Jonathan Fields sparked podcast.

spk_0 Now this was a herculean effort, but it was not without a purpose and a rationale.

spk_0 I wondered what would happen if I went all in.

spk_0 So after hybrid publishing free time that came out in March 2022.

spk_0 I had already had the free time podcast going since March of 2021 pivot.

spk_0 The book has sold really well so the podcast continues to do well too.

spk_0 I didn't have the heart to shut that down just because free time launched.

spk_0 Walk story short when I brought one stone creative on at the start of 2022.

spk_0 I really committed and I said I love podcasting.

spk_0 This feels like my zone of genius.

spk_0 I know it's really hard to earn a living in this arena and it's getting harder every year.

spk_0 I'll link to some articles in the show notes.

spk_0 But I've got to at least try this is definitely a thing that brings me joy where time is flying like all the advice that I give to other people when pivoting and following their passions and freeing up time.

spk_0 All of it pointed to the podcast for me.

spk_0 But after two years and going full steam add going all in 14 episodes a month like really trying to get the numbers up to the point where I could even be represented by an ad agency.

spk_0 I had to base cold hard facts.

spk_0 The truth the reality of the situation was that even after eight years of podcasting and two years of treating it like my full time job.

spk_0 They still weren't breaking even they were still costing more money to make and produce than they were earning through ad revenue.

spk_0 In fact I got rejected by two different ad agencies to represent me.

spk_0 That's why you don't ever hear me reading too many ads for other people's products unless they reach out to me independently outside of an agency.

spk_0 Though I am part of the megaphone slash Spotify ad network.

spk_0 So you hear ads running on the episodes but they earn less than if I were doing host read ads.

spk_0 Now if this were in the before time pre pandemic I probably wouldn't need to care if the podcast made money or not because my speaking career was doing just fine getting one or two paid speaking gigs a month.

spk_0 At that time in the before time they were often in person but even here or there throughout the pandemic when they were virtual that could provide a buffer for some of my more creative projects like the podcast.

spk_0 But in 2023 it just at least for me personally maybe other speakers had just as robust a year hitting the road or doing virtual sessions but for me it was really light.

spk_0 So without keynote speaking to grease the wheels of my business and even my household and provide those cash infusions.

spk_0 After two years of going all in I just looked at the numbers I looked at how much I was spending looked at how much I was earning and I also looked at my time my energy and my attention was really 80% on producing the podcast and then I would fit in other things around it.

spk_0 I realized that I can't justify investing so much going for another year because I didn't have the cushion of speaking gigs to fund the runway of the podcasts.

spk_0 So in a way I kind of needed them to grow faster than they did and of course I take full responsibility that I didn't figure out how to break through.

spk_0 Now again if you read some of the articles I've linked to they don't paint a pretty picture they essentially show that the math don't math anymore for independent shows.

spk_0 It's really only celebrity shows that do well not even the super highly produced ones that we were used to from back in the day like gimlets startup or other shows like that.

spk_0 So even popular podcasts even popular podcasts networks are struggling. It's really tough out there.

spk_0 In the past I was never somebody to let that stop me but if my business is not thriving then I need to take a pause.

spk_0 And so the two big decisions that I made there was one day where I was taking writer for a walk in mid November and all of a sudden I had that feeling that I describe in the opening of the free time book.

spk_0 Then I wanted to burn it all down and this little voice said to me stop everything.

spk_0 Part of me wondered if I was in a bad mood and okay okay burn it all down mode I know how to work through that and this feeling will go away.

spk_0 Something about the clarity of that message really told me okay I need to listen now.

spk_0 My business wants to become something else and I don't know what and I'm too busy producing the podcast preparing for interviews conducting the interviews editing the show notes checking everything before they go live even with a ton of help from an incredible team.

spk_0 I was spending so much time and effort and energy on this one arena that I really was not getting the clarity I needed on the bigger business picture.

spk_0 So I'll link to a post I did for Rolling in Doe where I did a serendipity stroll through New York City it's a photo essay where I'm looking for serendipity signage and I received so many of them on this one walk throughout my neighborhood.

spk_0 And that's a really fun one so again I'll put that in the show notes.

spk_0 By the time I came home I felt like yes this is the right decision this is what I need to do and it's very bittersweet I'll get to that in a minute there's a lot I'm going to miss during the pause.

spk_0 But the clarity came that there were two major things that I needed to put on hold one was my private BFF community for small heart based business owners and the other were the podcasts.

spk_0 Now both of them have been the thing that I have enjoyed the most both of them have given me so much the last few years if you're here listening you have brought me so much these shows wouldn't exist without you here listening, leaving ratings and reviews submitting questions sharing episodes with friends and for that I'm deeply grateful.

spk_0 And yet my business where it felt so stuck and just even financially is not really providing what I need to support my household or even to continue living in New York City although I'm still here hanging on to the nail.

spk_0 And so that's what I decided that even though I would be really sad to put these things on hold that I needed to step back I needed to create more space and I need to listen even deeper to what my business wants to become.

spk_0 And what I'm meant to be doing at the helm of this delightfully tiny media company that I'm running logistically at the time of this download I checked both podcast production calendars and I realized OK I've recorded at that time was probably 15 episodes each that were already recorded and in the can for both shows.

spk_0 And then I had about 10 interviews still to conduct for both shows so even though I had this insight in early to mid November you know assuming I didn't cancel all the interviews that I had already booked months prior the pause would actually start around mid February 2024.

spk_0 And so I don't know exactly what day you're going to be listening to this but it has been sitting so I've been sitting with the decision making sure it's what I want to do.

spk_0 And it does feel right I am ready to take a pause and the thing is even the download numbers for the shows it's not like they've been growing at such a rapid clip that it's encouraging me to keep going both shows stabilized.

spk_0 Even though it looks really good on listen notes which is one way you can get a back of an app and idea of the size of a show pivot is in the top point 5% of all podcasts and the last I checked free time was in the top 2.5% free time was nominated for a webby in the business episode category free time 1 2 W3 awards 3 actually silver for best host and gold for best podcast in the business category.

spk_0 Again pivot has been around so be the ninth year of the show pivot has over 360 episodes free time is over 260.

spk_0 I can't even do math that quickly. That's over 600 public episodes and another 100 that I had done for the private BFF community.

spk_0 That's a lot of content the fact that they didn't grow fast enough to be honest. I'm not trying to make excuses. I probably needed to spend a lot more on paid advertising that I did which was only tiny little experiments here and there.

spk_0 But I didn't have the extra money I was already struggling to stay afloat because I wasn't doing much speaking I lost a big licensing client.

spk_0 I didn't have it in me to take on coaching clients because I'm going through so much change.

spk_0 So I didn't want to take the risk of throwing thousands and thousands of dollars at advertisements knowing that it takes time to learn what works and even that's not guaranteed.

spk_0 So I didn't do the things that I probably quite needed to do to get them to grow enough and that's definitely on me.

spk_0 But I also think that if I'm being really honest with myself if the shows were good enough they would have had more listeners.

spk_0 I'm not saying that I'm not fishing for compliments. This is not an audio thirst trap. I'm just saying that I do believe that if things are unique enough and high enough quality that people cannot resist but to tell their friends.

spk_0 And it's not that they're bad. It's just that they might not be quite unique enough or have quite big enough listener base or I Jenny.

spk_0 I know my Achilles heel is marketing and creating big platforms. I'm not on social media. I'm so stubborn that way but that would really suck all the rest of the rest of the rest of the joy out.

spk_0 So I mean these are my flaws. These are my factors that play into this that made it really hard and just make it hard to be able to invest at the same level to keep it going and not only just needing clarity on what my business wanted to become but I was starting to feel especially with free time but also with pivot that I had said a lot of what I wanted to say.

spk_0 I was getting more and more stuck figuring out what I could share in solo episodes. It's not that I couldn't share little stories but I started to feel allergic to giving advice because when I'm in a really stuck liminal uncertain state.

spk_0 I'm not really in the mood to give advice. I don't really feel like anybody should listen to me. I can share my stories. I can share my experiences. That's what my rolling in dose sub stack is all about. It has nothing to do with advice. It's actually the opposite. It's like look at all these things that are going sideways or feeling confusing.

spk_0 And I fully understand the irony that I wrote a book called pivot about navigating what's next. And here I am kind of stuck not knowing what's next. All I can say is that I'm following the process. It didn't make it in the book but this phrase put yourself in the path of pivot.

spk_0 That's what I've got to do now. I've got to get out of all the old things I was doing from the before time and from my old life and my old business and I just need to see what's next and it is terrifying. It really is.

spk_0 And so I know so many of you have been going through this exact same thing, especially these last four years now. I can't believe it.

spk_0 But that's the gist of these decisions. I also want to say a huge thank you for being here listening. I was very excited to unwrap my Spotify wrapped for both shows. They did them for podcasters this year. Maybe for the second time, but I missed the previous year.

spk_0 And so I want to give a quick shout out because this was one of the things that gave me FOMO that if I stopped publishing, I felt so bad for the top listeners.

spk_0 Now these statistics are only for people who listen through the Spotify app. Of course, not a few listen through Apple podcasts or overcast or pocketcass or anywhere else.

spk_0 But just from Spotify alone, pivot, there were 681 of you for whom this is your top 10 podcast. There were 373 who this is your top five.

spk_0 And there were 65 people who this was your number one show.

spk_0 I just blows my mind. I can't even imagine one person having this as your number one show for pivot let alone 65. And then for free time, there were 423 of you who it's in your top 10.

spk_0 There are 247 for whom it's in your top five podcasts that you listen to on Spotify. And then there were 57 where free time is your number one show.

spk_0 And again, to totally blows my mind that of everything out there that you could listen to all the celebrity shows, all the big network shows, all the big business shows free time makes the top of your list.

spk_0 And so this was very bittersweet for me seeing this data because I felt like I don't want to disappoint you. If this is one of your favorite shows, I feel sad to put it on hold.

spk_0 But like I said, I am hoping you know I will not be able to resist having conversations with interesting people having an excuse to reach out and make new friends.

spk_0 But I do want to experiment with maybe inviting pink sub-sex subscribers to attend and listen and ask questions or maybe releasing more nitty gritty episodes behind the paywalls.

spk_0 We'll see. I mean, there are definitely ways to still have fun with this. And I got to shake it up a little.

spk_0 So that's the long and the short of it. You can hear that it's kind of a jumble of emotional reasons, business reasons, financial reasons.

spk_0 But most of all, I would say that because my business is in such a liminal confusing state, I know I need to just clear away the time and space.

spk_0 And that is taking the advice from free time. So I'm combining taking my own advice between pivot and free time. And that's what I'm up to.

spk_0 So I would encourage you to stay subscribed to these two shows pivot with Jenny Blake and free time with Jenny Blake.

spk_0 I would like wherever you listen to podcasts because I will drop interesting things to the feeds when I can.

spk_0 And I don't know. I was thinking if I return, maybe I would experiment with seasons, which I've never done where I would batch record episodes, maybe in one quarter or one season of the year.

spk_0 And I wouldn't release them in the next. And that would allow me to pick like 10 fascinating people, maybe even a long theme record them in the same batch of a couple weeks.

spk_0 And then they could drop out over 10 weeks or something. And then I could take a break. And maybe the seasonality of that would be fun. I mean, up till now, I've had a blast doing so many every week and every month.

spk_0 I've met so many friends and I love connecting with you who are here listening.

spk_0 Stay subscribed both to the podcast and again to the sub stacks because I do want to do things that might not go live on these feeds, but would be fun opportunities to interact and.

spk_0 Talk to cool guests with me because the sub stacks are at sub stack.com slash at Jenny Blake.

spk_0 And I'll put any links to things that I've mentioned in the show notes.

spk_0 Thank you again for being here. Thank you for listening to this. And I really do hope to see you soon.

spk_0 I just don't know exactly when.

spk_0 Wishing you all a wonderful day, week, month, year. And let's be sure to keep in touch.

spk_0 Thanks so much for listening to this episode of the pivot podcast.

spk_0 Make sure you don't miss an episode or my insider tips and templates by signing up for pivot list.

spk_0 A curated twice monthly newsletter where I share the inside scoop on what I'm reading, watching, listening to and the latest tools I'm geeking out on.

spk_0 Sign up at pivot method dot com slash pivot list. Get show notes from this episode at pivot method dot com slash podcast and connect with me on Twitter at Jenny underscore Blake.

spk_0 Remember build first then your courage will follow.

spk_0 Hasn't it always?

363: 🌈 Taking a Quiet Sabbatical and Pausing the Podcasts — For Now . . .

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