Technology
Cozy Prep for November
In this cozy episode, Rosie welcomes November with reflections on self-care and mental well-being. She shares personal insights on maintaining a 'tank' of daily essentials and offers tips fo...
Cozy Prep for November
Technology •
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Interactive Transcript
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I'm Rosie, your host.
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Happy November 1st.
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Welcome to November, everybody.
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I love this month.
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This month is my wedding anniversary.
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And this month, I think actually, you know, this is the point of no return when it comes to the darker days of the year.
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We're going to have a time change.
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We are going to have, you know, the most ominous events of all meeting with our families, no?
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And lots of other circumstantial events that will affect us.
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So I really wanted to get down to business with you and just share some tips on how I like to stay sane for lack of a better word.
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I had a really great therapist who is also a life coach who introduced me to the idea of a tank and whether or not my tank was full on a daily basis was part of my daily accountability with this therapist.
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So a tank can be many different things.
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But for me, my tank consisted of making sure that I got some movement, some kind of daily movement, making sure I had 64 ounces of water a day, making sure that I spent time outdoors or spent time doing something I really enjoyed that calmed me that wasn't, you know, a screen.
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So for me, that was 10 minutes of reading a book. I had to keep a gratitude list and I had to be very mindful about what I was eating.
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So for me, that was limiting my sugar intake, you know, sugar is in everything, but just like not housing a package of gummy worms because that's not going to make anyone feel good.
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All of those items were basically my daily tank, so to speak. And if my tank was full, then I could greet the world at the most qualified version of myself, my 100% me.
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And some days you only get three or four of those things in. And then as you continue on, I think you'll really begin to learn what makes your tank.
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And these are basic needs, you know what I mean? These are things that if you are feeling lousy, what can you turn around and do that will make you feel better?
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I've added some additional things into that list for me that is making sure I've taken my meds, making sure that I feel clean. I don't know why but a fresh shower can really turn a day around for me.
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And then also that's turning off social. And as someone who makes her living online, that can be very difficult to do.
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And I know that some of these items that I've listed out can be difficult for everyone to do, but I really invite you to make a list of five non-negotiables that you need to feel good.
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And sometimes at the beginning of this process, you may not even know what goes into your personal tank because I for sure didn't.
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That's how kind of lost I was a few years ago. I had no idea what would make me feel good.
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And I was even at a place where if you had told me the idea of this tank, I think I would have scoffed at you.
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I think I would have thought that you were being condescending to me like, yes, duh, I know to drink water.
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You don't need to tell me that. But it is very, very funny how on my busiest days where I really feel overwhelmed, I'll turn around and realize, oh my god, I haven't had anything but Dr. Pepper zero today.
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And thus I can drink a big, huge glass of water. I improve significantly.
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So just letting you know, some of these things seem obvious, childlike, maybe even a little bit condescending like I said, but they really can create a positive outcome for you.
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Another element that this therapist introduced to me was I had to write a hundred true statements about myself that were positive.
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Oh my gosh, that was so hard to do. But it ended up being magnificent. I still look back at that entry to this day when I need to brighten up my day.
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And I really advise doing that. All these things, I can, I guarantee you there was a place in my life that I used to exist in frequently, if not like for full calendar years where even hearing this advice, like not directed towards me.
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As an individual, but just directed to the greater population, I would have felt offended and angered by. I think that's just a reflection of the mental state that I was in. So if you feel like you're in that state right now, you might be at the place where you really need this advice the most.
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So don't reject it. And because this is a very significant November of which I'm sure you all know why I think that taking time to spend time alone unplugged not on your phone, not on television, not on YouTube, not anywhere with an algorithm is going to be so instrumental to you.
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Just seeing your community exist as it did the day before without too much immediate change that feels so good. Something I really love doing when I feel overwhelmed by the internet.
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It's just going on a walk in my neighborhood or going on a drive if I don't feel physically able to walk myself around that day.
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I take time to take note of all the people that I pass and I always like to think to myself, this person has no idea the drama that I'm going through.
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In fact, if I were to stop my car, open the window and explain to them what I was going through, they would probably be like, oh, I'm sorry about that.
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Or I'd need to preface that story with a thousand and one hints and exposition pieces because often my drama is so niche.
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It's about a friend group or something really granular about my job. And when I see how little impact it has on my community, I really can re-evaluate how much weight I'm putting on those situations.
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Obviously, people have things going on in their life that are monumental and big in life changing. I don't want to diminish those feelings.
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But I tend to get out of sorts the most when it comes to day-to-day tiny pieces of drama.
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I usually, and this might be an ADHD thing, who knows if it's the same for everyone else, but usually in dire situations, sometimes I'm able to lock in and really see through the fog.
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But when it comes to small social things, wondering why I wasn't invited to a party when I'm not talking to a friend as much as I used to or if someone said a comment that didn't sit well with me,
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I tend to really go into a deep, dark spiral about those things when I should really just let life be and come back to it, revisit later on.
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I feel like the chat today is getting a little bit too emotional and I wanted this to feel like a nice cozy comforting place for you.
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So, I hope that I gave you some interesting tools to consider. That water one is a big one for me, and then 10 minutes of reading.
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You know, like there was such an emphasis on non-fiction reading, read some fiction, read some freaky fairy stuff, you know, like get completely lost, exist on a different plane.
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I really think that's fun.
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All that being said, I have recently been listening to Ina Gartan's memoir Be Ready When The Luck Happens.
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And if there's anything to coincide with what I was just talking about about not letting problems overwhelm you, I think this memoir is such a good example of that.
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Ina has been through so many personal challenges and difficulties in her lifetime, but the way that she resolves them in this book, it's so comforting to read.
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It's comforting to see how far she's come since her troubled childhood, the relationship issue she overcomes with her husband, Jeffrey, and all of her professional challenges that she's overcome.
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Really, really impressive memoir made me feel so cozy, and the way that she writes, again, things don't become dire or intense.
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She has a very happy, go lucky glass half full perspective, especially in retrospect. I think she was really able to look back and really see her personal challenges as things that contributed to her character and her story.
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And I just think it's a really beautiful portrait of a woman that I really admire.
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My husband and I listened to it on a quick road trip up to Maine this last weekend, and I just swooned.
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Every element of her love story with Jeffrey just is so romantic, and the descriptions of food and travel will make you feel so romantic.
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It's a fabulous read, and an even more fabulous listen.
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Anytime there's a celebrity memoir that I, a person that I admire, I always get the audio book, because there's just something about hearing those words from the person themselves.
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So if you have an audible subscription, this is not an ad, highly, highly suggest making your monthly credit.
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Be ready when the luck happens by Ina Garten. It's just, it is perfect for this time of year.
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I love it. Put it on while you're cleaning the house, put it on while you're on a walk on your commute.
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It's just so inspiring and so grounding.
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If you haven't changed up your fragrance, it's the time of year to do it. I really love keeping my perfumes divided.
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Some of them go in perfume prison, which is a drawer, and the other ones are displayed beautifully out and about.
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So the ones that are out and about right now, for me, are merit retrospect. I did a partnership with them on Instagram, and I wasn't allowed to say this because I was working with the company.
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But it smells like a more grown up version of Glossier U. So you can understand why I couldn't say that.
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I couldn't mention another brand, but if you love Glossier U, I think that merit retrospect is, is her grown up and a successful businesswoman.
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I loved that fragrance so much. It was an honor to work with them on Instagram. And they sent me three bottles of it.
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And I was a little overwhelmed because I was like, what am I going to do with all these? But I'm spraying that.
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I'm lousy with it. You know what I am spraying it all over my body? It's a fantastic scent, and I recommend it.
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Another fragrance that I always bring out this time of year, late fall, and into the holidays.
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I love replica by the fireplace. Oh my god. It's burning wood and chestnuts, and it just smells like the most cozy holiday night in.
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I love wearing this. I wore it to the movies once, and there were two women on either side of me, and they kept asking, what are you wearing?
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What is the scent? And I passed it on. It has since become pretty tick tock well known, and for good reason.
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But I'm also kind of like dang, maybe I should have been gatekeeping that day at the movies because who knows how many other women they told, etc.
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But it is a perfect fall and holiday fragrance. So those are the two that I am wearing a lot right now.
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There's something about reserving things and savoring them at certain times of the year that I really like.
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And I'm an impulsive person who, I'm the type of person who wants to eat the whole box chocolate as soon as I get them.
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I don't have too much restraint. But I have since figured out as an adult woman that if I can restrain myself and save certain things,
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for certain times of the year, they really do feel all the more special. And listen, there's a caveat to every single thing because I am definitely a big believer in the don't save the fancy cream, don't save the fancy dress kind of a thing.
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But let's say you own more than one fragrance. Let's say you own more than one spice in your cabinet.
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If there are certain things that you can parse out and save for certain times of the year, so you really associate them with that time, do that.
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I highly suggest it. But if you've only got one fragrance, by all means, do not save that. For only one time of the year, you're going to wear that all year round.
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I thought I was going to read so much during the month of October, but I didn't read a single book all the way through Cover to Cover.
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I had a few false starts, but overall no book was fully finished during my favorite month of the year. I felt very busy this month quite overwhelmed that it tons of travel.
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And by the end of the day on most days, all I wanted to do was watch television or play a video game. So hopefully in the month of November, I will be reading more.
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But as somebody who loves spooky season, love spooky books and ghost stories and gothic romance, I am a little shocked that I couldn't finish a single book.
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I had quite a few false starts and beginnings of books that I thought were beautiful pieces of literature that I know I will cherish eventually, but there was just something about everything going on in my life professionally that kept me from
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really taking the time to read a book. So one of my cozy goals for November is to read a full book. Let's do it.
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I'm curious. Are you Mariah Carey? Is today Christmas for you? As soon as November 1st hits, or are you more of a turkey tom?
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Is this still a fall month? Is fall until Black Friday for you? I love how I've divided it into two different. The two options are are you Mariah Carey? Are you turkey tom?
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I feel like because of my job, I must be a Mariah Carey, but in my soul, I'm a little bit of a turkey tom because it's finally truly autumn outside.
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And I mean the autumn that I like where the trees are a little bit spindly and the leaves are all changed. I recently learned that peak autumn means that green is still there, so peak means that the widest variety of leaf foliage color.
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So if there's no more green than you are technically past peak, which is what we are right now, but to me this is peak. This is peak. I like some naked tree branches mixed with the deep, atominal hues.
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And to be honest with you, I don't find October to be all that spooky. The sunlight is so golden, we have more sunny days than foggy dark ones.
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It's truly not a scary time of year, but November forward is scary, spooky space. It's spooky scary.
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So I'm going to be reading some dark academia books, hopefully. Maybe I'll keep reading my horror thriller. I like creepy Christmas books.
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And I also like romance Christmas books. So I'll probably start reading those very soon. It's also the time of year to make sure that you have your humidifier.
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My friend Jackie told me about the canopy humidifier that is specifically made for your skin. And I got it and it made a big difference.
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I already, as I'm speaking to you right now, I just got out of the shower. I feel the scales on my skin. So I know it's that time of year. It has arrived.
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I feel like today's podcast is very all over the place, which is fine. We love that energy. But I think it's also the energy of like batting down the hatches.
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We're getting ready for the dark days of winter. Winter is coming. There's so much I want to do this time of year.
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Because I feel like as it gets colder and colder, those looming social invitations start to disintegrate a little bit.
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And I have the freedom of being at home for long stretches of time, which I love.
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My dream is to be the matriarch of my family and to ensure that everyone comes to my neck of the woods for all holidays.
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And I don't have to go anywhere. So that's what I've been working towards. I would say my entire adult life.
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I don't want to go home for Christmas. I want you to come to my home for Christmas. And what I'm going to do, oh, and Thanksgiving too, can't ignore her.
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How I'm going to ensure that is I'm going to move to the Northeast. Hello, my relatives are based in Texas.
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So I just want to just say like if you're going to, if you're going to celebrate someplace, it's not going to be Texas. It's going to be a new England.
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But I'm not there yet, not homeowner yet. Maybe someday. But that is the goal to get people to come to my house.
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And I make the bird, baby. I make that turkey because I have these long stretches of time where I am now left to myself.
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I've got all the activities on lot. I've got Lego sets. I've got books. I am ready to deep dive into a television program.
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I might just rewatch real housewives. I need to get into real housewives with Salt Lake City.
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I know that that's the big one, the important one. But for whatever reason, I haven't latched on to any particular character or storyline within the first season.
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But I know I got a champion through to get to all the good drama. I'm just so excited to burrow and hibernate for the next few months.
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Oh, so nice. I'm not going anywhere for the holidays. Thank goodness.
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I will say that is one of the main joys of not having kids is that I do not have to,
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thusly, take them on a tour of relatives. And I respect anyone that has to do that.
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I give you all my positive energy having to get anyone on to an airplane, any child or teenager on an airplane.
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And anyone who complains about your kid needs some noise canceling headphones.
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I have my whole situation for flights on lock. I've got my noise canceling headphones. I have my iPad.
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Before the plane takes off, I'm watching Emma 2019. And your Taylor Joy. That's my plane movie. I'm locked in.
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I've got a little neck pillow. I've got a little blinky. And anyone who complains about your children needs to invest in some headphones.
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And if they don't have children, they have no reason to not have some noise canceling headphones.
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You're welcome. I'm my business on an airplane now.
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If you're a fan of this podcast, if you want to have some say in the direction that we go,
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I currently post episodes on both Mondays and Fridays. And I'm always looking for suggestions or requests.
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If you want me to do an episode dedicated to Thanksgiving side dishes, I am so happy to do that. Send me a DM.
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I am always looking for topics of discussion. And I want to make sure this feels like a communal effort.
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And I love taking requests, consider me DJ Kozy over here.
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In order to prove that I take my advice as well as provide it, I am going to share three things that I am grateful for.
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Number one, I'm grateful for my cats. Those guys are so silly. One of them is trying to leave the office right now and is creating such a commotion.
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I love them to death. I have one very mischievous one and have one very calm, quiet and sassy one. So grateful for my cats.
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Number two, I just got a new desk chair with lumbar support. Technically it is a gaming chair, but I will be using it for work days.
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And it reclines all the way back with a little kickstand. Oh my god, I'm so pumped about this chair. And all the worlds are going to conquer while sitting in it.
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So gaming chair, keeping my back straight and comfortable. And the third thing I'm grateful for.
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Thanks giving stuffing the best side dish in the world, particularly if it has here we go sausage and white wine.
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Oh my god, if the stuffing has sausage and white wine in it, that is the best stuffing ever.
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I need to finesse my Thanksgiving recipes. I'm happy to share them this month, but even just getting a box stuffing and making sure that you have good breakfast sausage torn up in there and some white wine.
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Oh yeah, that's good. It's going to be a good month. I can feel it. Happy November everybody. Thank you so much for joining me.
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Leave a review and I'll see you next time. Happy November everybody.
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You