Episode 29: Married To Shame - Episode Artwork
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Episode 29: Married To Shame

In Episode 29 of the Marriage Counselor's Corner, Dr. David Taylor explores the complex theme of shame and its profound impact on marriages. Drawing from Tim Fletcher's teachings, he delves ...

Episode 29: Married To Shame
Episode 29: Married To Shame
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Interactive Transcript

spk_0 Welcome to the Marriage Counselor's Corner.
spk_0 Right this way, your therapist will see you shortly.
spk_0 In the meantime, sit back, kick your feet up on the couch, and get ready to focus on adding
spk_0 very valuable tools to your Mirrors Toolkit.
spk_0 And now your host the Marriage Counselor, David Taylor.
spk_0 What's up guys?
spk_0 Yeah, guess what?
spk_0 I'm back.
spk_0 That's right, I am back.
spk_0 My name is David Taylor and I am your host.
spk_0 Yes, it is true.
spk_0 I am back in the booth.
spk_0 Finally, after taking off, probably I don't know half a year, more than half a year now.
spk_0 I'm here, y'all.
spk_0 I'm here. I promise I'm alive.
spk_0 Everything is going well.
spk_0 And I promise you, I have been very, very, very busy.
spk_0 This is good though.
spk_0 I'm not the same person that I was since the last episode for starters.
spk_0 You can now officially call me Dr. David Taylor.
spk_0 Yes, I successfully defended my dissertation in January and then I graduated this past May with my doctorate.
spk_0 I finally have that busy and demanding doctorate program behind me, y'all.
spk_0 That's why I'm back and I'm energized and I'm focused.
spk_0 And guess what?
spk_0 We've also rebranded our primary marriage related business from mastering marriage to the mastering marriage institute.
spk_0 And that in and of itself is a huge undertaking as I have also updated all of our website.
spk_0 See, I got some stuff for you with some new additions that many of you will be excited to learn about.
spk_0 So stick around for details on that later.
spk_0 So yes, I'm here y'all. I'm missed y'all.
spk_0 I've gotten tons and tons and tons of messages.
spk_0 Even negative reviews about my absence.
spk_0 Okay, so that tells me that I should have been back a long time ago.
spk_0 So I appreciate y'all holding me accountable.
spk_0 Yes, I'm here.
spk_0 Now, some of you may be wondering, okay, why the mastering marriage institute?
spk_0 Why did we rebrand it?
spk_0 Well, you guys have heard me talk about this before, but it's my passion to be the premier reading.
spk_0 It's a resource or marriage enrichment and education.
spk_0 I want to provide more resources to enrich your marriage and to educate your marriage.
spk_0 So it is only natural that we take this next leap in our evolution.
spk_0 Now, be sure to listen out for more updates in this space as we go on,
spk_0 because I'll share with you more updates on that.
spk_0 But I'm here. I'm back.
spk_0 And now that I've reintroduced myself.
spk_0 Yeah, let's get to the reason that you came here to begin with. Let's talk about the marriage counselors corner podcast now
spk_0 if you are a normal listener or if you're new just know that this is the place where you get credible and tangible
spk_0 Marriage related information from a licensed mental health counselor and doctor over the past two decades of my clinical
spk_0 Experience I've discovered some things a lot of things actually that work to make your marriage healthy
spk_0 So I want you to see these episodes as a master class and marriage where I take a psychological and practical approach to marriage education and
spk_0 Enrichment and this is episode number 29 and and today's episode and today's session and today's meeting
spk_0 I will be discussing a topic that
spk_0 It took me a while to develop due to how complex and deep it is actually
spk_0 This is this is a topic that's been revolving a theme that's been revolving in many of my sessions over the last few months
spk_0 Usually when there is a constant theme that comes up I lean into it to see what else is there and in doing so
spk_0 I discovered Tim Fletcher's teachings on
spk_0 Shame and was amazed with his presentation on these ideas
spk_0 So I'll be referencing him throughout the course of my teachings today and in today's session again episode number 29
spk_0 I will be discussing shame now more specifically because I need y'all to I need y'all to listen
spk_0 More specifically I will be discussing what shame is
spk_0 Where it comes from and how shame impacts the way people show up in their marriages
spk_0 Now this information is way tea and pretty dense. It's a lot there
spk_0 However, I will attempt to deconstruct it in a manner that is tangible and easily understood
spk_0 Now although this information is for your marriage
spk_0 This information is mainly for you the spouse as
spk_0 Most people bring their shame with them into their marriage in all actuality most people are
spk_0 Married to their shame. That's right. You heard that correctly now
spk_0 Before you disqualify yourself into thinking that this topic has nothing to do with you
spk_0 Just stick around a little you just might be pleasantly
spk_0 surprised
spk_0 first off
spk_0 Shame is not merely any motion. Oh, and y'all we got started we we already started, okay?
spk_0 So just go ahead and get your pen and pat because we're gonna dive in today
spk_0 So but anyway shame is not merely in emotion
spk_0 Actually shame is a core belief shame is less about how you feel and more about what and how you think about yourself
spk_0 Shame is a core belief that you often
spk_0 Won't be aware of it lurks in the shadows of our subconscious and our conscious
spk_0 But it's lurking but it's in the shadows. So you ain't gonna see it see shame can be defined as a
spk_0 skewed sense of self
spk_0 It is about seeing yourself as not lovable not valuable not good enough or less than it affects how you see
spk_0 Your identity
spk_0 Now speaking of core beliefs
spk_0 Core beliefs are beliefs and thoughts that happen on an automatic and subconscious level
spk_0 these are thoughts that frame and
spk_0 Shape how you interact with the world around you and these are thoughts that ultimately influence how you show up inside of your marriage
spk_0 More on that in a bit
spk_0 See, I need to take the time to go through this because some of you
spk_0 Probably a lot of y'all we be in an honest
spk_0 Will most likely disqualify yourself because on the surface you think that you're good enough you go to church you
spk_0 Quote your scriptures and you speak your affirmations you smile at yourself in the mirror
spk_0 Your appear optimistic you feed the homeless and thus you believe that shame has no hold on you
spk_0 That is
spk_0 Until I start asking questions
spk_0 But again, I'm getting ahead of myself see the main point here though is that shame is
spk_0 Not easy to pick up on in most people because we have an instinctual drive to be seen as all-tristic
spk_0 We want to be seen as good enough even when we don't believe it
spk_0 So we cover the shame with muscles with a full beard with fake eyelashes
spk_0 With makeup with bbls with name brands and Instagram filters
spk_0 We hide it well y'all we do we do a good job of hiding it well
spk_0 however
spk_0 There is one place where I have found shame to be exposed
spk_0 The most
spk_0 That place is inside of your marriage
spk_0 I have found that if you have shame
spk_0 It will most certainly show up inside of your marriage
spk_0 Now before I can get to that
spk_0 It's important for me to speak briefly on where shame comes from
spk_0 And for this I will be referencing Tim Fletcher's teachings because of how concise they are
spk_0 First of all shame happens as a result of
spk_0 Us not getting what we should have gotten during the formative years of our childhoods
spk_0 The formative years are the first seven to eight years of a child's life
spk_0 How the child experiences these years sets the stage for how they will experience the rest of their lives
spk_0 So think of these first seven to eight years of your life as the foundation that holds up all of the rest of your life
spk_0 That means y'all that
spk_0 You never will truly deviate from the path of thinking and feeling that you developed
spk_0 During these first seven to eight years and I know I know that sounds weird
spk_0 But walk with me, okay? Just stay with me. I got you
spk_0 There's more to see here y'all this let's go a little deeper
spk_0 To add to that
spk_0 If you have dealt with trauma during those years
spk_0 You would most likely have shame issues to some extent
spk_0 Now I know I'm using the word issues. So again some of you guys will try to disqualify yourselves
spk_0 But just stick with me for a little while please just for a little while
spk_0 I know I haven't been around in a minute so some of y'all don't know me that well, but just just walk with me
spk_0 Now if you have dealt with complex trauma the chances of you struggling with shame goes even higher
spk_0 Again before you disqualify yourself
spk_0 I want you to think of trauma as something that happens inside of you
spk_0 after something
spk_0 happens to you
spk_0 I say this because most people only think of complex trauma when they hear the word trauma and
spk_0 Complex trauma are things like abuse of any kind
spk_0 molestation abandonment divorce
spk_0 illnesses
spk_0 death
spk_0 Accidents or injuries it could even be things like bullying right but there are other things that are treated as traumatic that perhaps were more
spk_0 discrete
spk_0 Again, try not to disqualify yourself here instead. Let's see what is true for you
spk_0 With what I am about to share because we're gonna talk about some of these things
spk_0 Think of it from this angle all babies. I mean all babies
spk_0 Come into this world looking to be loved
spk_0 It is inherent in who we are as humans
spk_0 As we mature into our childhood this desire to be loved shifts into questions that we often ask
spk_0 See we want to be desired. We want to have value. We want to feel good enough
spk_0 We want someone to have a relationship with us. We want to feel connected
spk_0 But keep in mind
spk_0 These aren't questions that a child will verbalize rather they are looking for evidences to answer these questions
spk_0 They are looking to the mirrors of their life to answer those unasked questions
spk_0 Usually those initial questions sound something like this
spk_0 Do I have value and how much value do I have do I matter?
spk_0 Do I have anything to offer am I lovable am I desirable?
spk_0 Am I important and my significant? Am I good?
spk_0 Now again
spk_0 They will not verbalize these questions because often these are kids these are children, right?
spk_0 So they may not even have the words to say but these are things that are thought and felt and instead they are looking for the answers
spk_0 Reflected back to them by the mirrors of their lives
spk_0 So those mirrors begin with mom and dad, right your guardians how they treated you as a child
spk_0 How they communicated to you as a child all those things mirrored back to you whether you had value
spk_0 And if you were lovable in a healthy home the child will get a healthy reflection mirrored back to them
spk_0 They may get a message that they have great inherent value
spk_0 That love is not predicated on what you do but rather who you are
spk_0 But in an unhealthy home
spk_0 They get the opposite
spk_0 They learn that feeling loved is about performance
spk_0 About presentation
spk_0 or progress
spk_0 That to be worthy of your parents love means that you have to
spk_0 Earn it
spk_0 They learn love is conditional
spk_0 Now
spk_0 This isn't just the extremes though. So here are some very discrete ways
spk_0 To get back a negative reflection from your parents or those closest to you because sometimes it's not just about the parents
spk_0 It's about siblings and other people that are also influential in your childhood
spk_0 See if anything that I'm about to list
spk_0 Resonates with what you experienced while growing up remember. I want you to qualify yourself not disqualify yourself
spk_0 So instead of trying to find out how this is not true
spk_0 I want you to ask yourself in what ways is or are these things true
spk_0 Okay, so here are a few things
spk_0 I want to see what resonates and these are things that you will get mirrored back from you
spk_0 You may have got married back from you from your parents
spk_0 So if you shared your opinion and you were laughed at or not taken seriously
spk_0 This perhaps communicated that you were stupid or lacked anything of value to contribute
spk_0 If you were belittled like being told that you would never amount to anything you are a failure
spk_0 You are always doing wrong things being clumsy or embarrassing that could have also
spk_0 Reflected back to you that something was wrong with you
spk_0 If you were compared to other family members or individuals who they saw as successful
spk_0 If you were blamed for your parents problems
spk_0 If you were not allowed to express your emotions or communicate your thoughts
spk_0 Right if you grew up in the 80s you probably heard this kids should be seen not heard
spk_0 Right
spk_0 If you had to deal with a parent or parents not following through on their words or promises
spk_0 I promise I'm gonna come visit you today and today ends up becoming a week
spk_0 Are you sitting on the porch waiting for a parent to show up and they never showed up right?
spk_0 That's another reflection that you probably got
spk_0 More are if there was a lack of discipline or healthy boundaries
spk_0 Or if there was neglect or emotionally unavailable parents perhaps due to working too much
spk_0 Due to their own issues due to illnesses due to having too many kids due to divorce
spk_0 Alcoholism drug use right all those things
spk_0 If your parents or caregivers were all about image and presentation
spk_0 Also this could come from having parents who only rewarded you when you achieved something or if you were constantly criticized
spk_0 Another one is if there was a lack of nurturing or affection or validation
spk_0 Maybe your parents value system also reflected a message
spk_0 See I have worked with teens who were in perfectly healthy shape
spk_0 But developed an eating disorder due to one of their parents being you know either thin or
spk_0 imposing this value on them about their body image
spk_0 Here's another one that I've personally experienced and this was me David
spk_0 Going to school when I was a kid and having to wear my sister's boyfriend's hand me down clothes while everybody else got to wear their new
spk_0 Clothes during you know that first week of school when everybody's wearing their new clothes and shoes
spk_0 I got the hand me down clothes. That's another thing that could have contributed to shame
spk_0 Another one is abandonment see Tim flexure says that
spk_0 This sends perhaps the greatest message of shame and self-worth
spk_0 So if you were abandoned if you were
spk_0 Adoption or in the adoption system
spk_0 That's another huge contributor to having a negative self reflection
spk_0 Also not being able to make a distinction between who the child is and what they do
spk_0 See in a healthy family the child can do something bad or something wrong
spk_0 But still be loved and not seen as a bad child on the flip side with a shame a child can do something bad
spk_0 And is treated as a bad child
spk_0 In some cases the parents will even withhold love attention or validation from that child when they do something wrong
spk_0 Right, so these if you is I want you to listen to those things and maybe some of those resonated with your experience
spk_0 While growing up those are things that can contribute to shame think of the difference between guilt and shame as guilt is
spk_0 I do something wrong so I feel wrong where a shame says I did something wrong
spk_0 So I am a bad person or I'm a wrong person right that's the difference between guilt and shame now
spk_0 These things the things that I just mentioned from your parents
spk_0 These things will send a message to you a reflection to you about your worth
spk_0 The child will tend to use these reflections as a way to
spk_0 answer the questions that
spk_0 They already are asking themselves about self-worth
spk_0 Value and whether or not they are lovable
spk_0 So that's just the parent mirror. There's a lot of mirrors. I'm just gonna give you a few
spk_0 Right here's another mirror that also reflects back to the child and at this point maybe the teenager
spk_0 Images about their self-worth a major
spk_0 Mirror is Hollywood culture and social media
spk_0 Right, there are constant messages on beauty standards and attraction and desire
spk_0 That are perpetuated in the media and these standards are often captured by us regular individuals as what normal should be
spk_0 So we look at what they're doing as celebrities with all the money and the makeup and resources it means and they will say well wait
spk_0 Even though I'm normal I should be at that standard or I should look that way or I should my body should be shaped that way
spk_0 Now, Abra you ain't got that kind of money in those resources, right?
spk_0 See physical attraction is celebrated. This is why for many women they won't go outside
spk_0 Without their faces on okay, not all y'all okay. Don't get on me. I just got to speak my truth
spk_0 Or for many guys they want to portray the illusion of strength and bravado
spk_0 So go to any gym and you're gonna see a bunch of guys
spk_0 Convincing themselves by looking in the literal mirror that they are strong enough right and
spk_0 They have this idea that this equal self-worth okay, so that's another major mirror
spk_0 Hollywood culture. This is why like if you grew up in the 80s and 90s all the action heroes had muscles
spk_0 Right they all were strong think of Arnold Schwarzenegger
spk_0 Sylvester Stallone right these are guys that when you look at them in Rambo or these movies that portrayed these
spk_0 Super action heroes they all had muscles and strength and chisel jaws right?
spk_0 This is what they look like that was the illusion of attraction. That's another mirror another mirror another massive mirror
spk_0 Is the school and education system? Heck the whole grading system is
spk_0 Performance base. It's a performance based metric and I'm not saying that it is not useful
spk_0 But let's be clear. We all want to be seen as the smart kids the ones capable of getting straight A's and A's make us feel competent
spk_0 C's D's and F's
spk_0 Don't I remember growing up in grade school getting free McDonald's vouchers for being on the honor roll
spk_0 I felt smart and the school reinforced that right but those who didn't achieve that honor roll
spk_0 Well, guess what they were beneath me
spk_0 It was literally called the honor roll or in some cases the deans list. I made the list
spk_0 Right I had one client
spk_0 Graduate at the head of her class in high school because she felt that this would get her family to love her more
spk_0 Only to find herself feeling unfulfilled
spk_0 After achieving that milestone her shame was reinforced even after getting a high GPA
spk_0 Also
spk_0 Social groups and school become a mirror that impacts the child's self-concept
spk_0 So that's another mirror to look into
spk_0 Another major mirror that we're going to talk about a little bit is the church
spk_0 Don't crucify me. I'm here to speak truth. I know my purpose. Okay, but the church
spk_0 is another massive mirror
spk_0 See some of you guys have dealt with shame because of church hurt
spk_0 You went to the church looking to find a loving God only to find a God little G God who judged you for the way you talked
spk_0 For how scripturally inept you were for the fact that you didn't give enough on your tithes and offerings or you missed your six a.m.
spk_0 Prayer call
spk_0 Some of you gave your pastor permission to shame blame you
spk_0 Because you didn't give to the building fund or you didn't lift your hands high enough during praise and worship
spk_0 Some of you felt the pressure to fit into a church culture that was established on the foundation of
spk_0 Fake and phony and I hear all the stories all the horror stories. You know, I hear them
spk_0 You weren't allowed to be your true self at church and thus you left feeling unseen
spk_0 Unclean and an outcast more on that in the bit
spk_0 Let's be honest marriage can be hard even good couples here rough seasons were communication breaks down
spk_0 Trust is shaken or you just start to feel more like roommates than partners
spk_0 But it doesn't have to stay that way at the master marriage institute. We believe your marriage is worth fighting for and
spk_0 Healing is possible
spk_0 That's why we've created our brand new virtual mirrors workshops
spk_0 Led by a licensed mental health therapist with over 20 years of clinical experience
spk_0 This isn't your typical marriage advice or one size fits all contents
spk_0 These two day workshops are interactive deeply practical and rooted in both biblical truth and real clinical insights
spk_0 Whether you're newly married or decades in this is your chance to take intentional steps towards
spk_0 Stronger and healthier marriage, but here's the catch
spk_0 Space is limited to just 30 couples in our first cohort
spk_0 So every couple gets the attention and support they need
spk_0 So don't wait until things get worse
spk_0 Visit mastery marriage institute dot com today to register and secure your spot
spk_0 That's mastery marriage institute dot com
spk_0 Your marriage is worthy investment. Let's take the first step together
spk_0 Okay
spk_0 Okay, so by now you have most likely qualified yourself based on one or many of those aforementioned mirrors
spk_0 Now I want to briefly and I do mean briefly
spk_0 talk about how shame impacts the marriage
spk_0 And I want to give you four ways that shame can impact your marriage now
spk_0 This is important because if you have qualified yourself
spk_0 Now I want you to start looking at the ways that this impacts and impedes your marriage
spk_0 So the first way that shame can impact your marriage is this shame makes the marriage and your spouse
spk_0 Responsible for fixing in the present the broken pieces of you that your past produced
spk_0 See we often bring with us our brokenness
spk_0 From our past and we put them on full display in the present and we're expecting our marriage
spk_0 Again, it's a subconscious
spk_0 But we're expecting our marriage to fix those things that are broken
spk_0 This is why we say things like I want you to complete me or you complete me or you're my better half right
spk_0 We're often looking to fill those holes with the things that our spouse bring with them
spk_0 To us that we feel we need from them. So again shame makes the marriage
spk_0 And your spouse responsible for fixing in you what they did not break. Okay, that's important
spk_0 Now because of time
spk_0 Limitations I'm not going to sit here and talk about what to do with this
spk_0 You're going to have to come visit me for that or come hang out at one of our
spk_0 Weekend workshops. We'll talk about that in a minute
spk_0 But I want you to be thinking about that. Here's another way that shame
spk_0 Impacts the marriage number two shame limits your ability to truly be loved by your spouse
spk_0 After all, how can they truly see the real you if shame is your projection
spk_0 See we often aren't aware of what we are projecting
spk_0 And so if we are projecting shame or shame-based actions and attitudes and thought processes
spk_0 We aren't really showing our true self
spk_0 And as a byproduct you're going to find yourself fully
spk_0 Unloved by your spouse maybe it's because they don't know how to love you because they don't know how to love you
spk_0 But maybe it's because they don't know how to love you because you aren't showing the person
spk_0 Of you that needs to be loved by them. There's a distinction
spk_0 Hopefully you get it sometimes they can't love you because you're not even positioning your true self to be loved
spk_0 Okay, because shame can limit how much of you you show them
spk_0 Often shame will cause you to hide
spk_0 To cover up to produce a distorted perspective of who you really are
spk_0 Let me go to the next one number three shame. I just used this word shame distorts reality
spk_0 And shame can cause you to misread what your
spk_0 Spouse is actually saying to you
spk_0 Shame can cause you to hear things that they did not say because you're constantly interpreting
spk_0 gaps filling in the information
spk_0 You will tend to interpret things in a way to confirm the shame that is protecting you
spk_0 Yes
spk_0 Your shame is often protecting you and as humans we're often
spk_0 Actually, we're usually looking for confirmation in all of the things all the areas of our life
spk_0 So you guys have probably heard of confirmation bias. That's what it looks like right if I'm outside with you
spk_0 And I say hey look at that cloud looks like Mickey Mouse and then your mind you like not
spk_0 I don't look like no Mickey Mouse, but in my mind
spk_0 I have to confirm that to be true
spk_0 So it I'm seeing that even though it may not even look like that, okay?
spk_0 The same can be the case in the marriage
spk_0 You just rejected me you just rejected a bit. Well, maybe you didn't but maybe my shame is distorting
spk_0 Your actions, okay?
spk_0 Causing me to hear something that you did not say
spk_0 Causing you to read too deeply into something that they did not say and trust me
spk_0 I see this all the time in marriages
spk_0 Number four here's just the fourth way there are more than four ways by the way guys
spk_0 But I just want to give you four here's another important way that shame can impact your marriage is shame causes you to live
spk_0 in a perpetual state of coping
spk_0 Well, this is a good one emotions like anger anxiety depression self-pity defensiveness even something like complex PTSD
spk_0 Right these things become how you react to conflicts in your marriage
spk_0 Instead of using healthy coping skills and healthy coping tools as a matter of fact if you are wrestling with shame
spk_0 You probably don't have a lot of healthy coping tools
spk_0 Because you've gotten so used to using shame as a way to protect you
spk_0 And so that becomes a perpetual state of coping some people who struggle with shame find themselves often in a perpetual loop of drama and conflict
spk_0 Something always is going on some issue
spk_0 some unresolved situation some new situation, but it's always something coming up every day every week
spk_0 It's often because they need this shame this issue because they're used to coping with it a certain way
spk_0 And we don't like to abandon how we cope okay, so listen I could stay there. I could go even deeper with this because
spk_0 Huh, this is just a tip of the iceberg, but I didn't want to you know me coming back after a couple months a lot of months of
spk_0 Off the air. I didn't want to overwhelm you guys with a lot of information
spk_0 I just wanted to say I'm back in I'm back. I'm back in the booth
spk_0 so
spk_0 I will most likely spend a whole other session
spk_0 whole other episode just to cover these four things and probably add to those
spk_0 Now if I have more time I will go deeper, but I want to spare you guys
spk_0 But instead I invite you to reach out to me
spk_0 If you like to go deeper with this concept like if you're wrestling with shame and you've seen it show up in your marriage
spk_0 You maybe have complex PTSD or some other issue that's just plaguing your mayors
spk_0 plaguing how you show up
spk_0 Reach out to me if you don't want to wait until I do another episode
spk_0 I implore you to email me directly at David at Marpe in May RPE
spk_0 Services.com and you can get on my calendar and I know many of you guys are reached out and you've often said hey
spk_0 Dave man, it's it's tough to get a hold of you. It's because I've been busy y'all have been I've been very busy
spk_0 And I've been busy working with many of you guys many of my listeners reach out and they get on the calendar
spk_0 So keep doing that
spk_0 In the meantime though, I want to give you an action item
spk_0 For your action item I want you to answer these two questions. They're only two. Okay, I want you to answer these questions number one
spk_0 What mirrors have caused the most shame in my life now?
spk_0 I just only went through a few right your parenting mirror
spk_0 Hollywood culture and social media
spk_0 school and education
spk_0 church
spk_0 Right, those are just a few mirrors
spk_0 There are more but of those that I mentioned
spk_0 Have any of those caused shame and to what degree and then number two of the four ways that shame can impact your marriage
spk_0 Which of those ways are relevant to you in your marriage
spk_0 So those four ways that I went over of how shame impacts the marriage which of those are relevant to you and your marriage
spk_0 Okay, and I just want you to focus on those two questions
spk_0 Okay, just focus on those two as your action item
spk_0 so
spk_0 Let's let's do this because I'm gonna wrap up here, but I just want you to know I just I want to spark a
spk_0 deeper level of self-awareness right now
spk_0 I don't want to we don't have to go deeper into the like the solutions yet
spk_0 I want you self-aware. I want you thinking about these things the healing and the growth will come it'll come
spk_0 Trust me, but I want you to be more aware of
spk_0 Where this impacts you the most okay?
spk_0 Well, here's what I'll do. I'll wrap up here
spk_0 Just know that it is my desire that both you and your spouse
spk_0 You this information to take your marriage to the next level
spk_0 But remember you only get out of your marriage what you put into your marriage not what you want from your marriage
spk_0 So get to work putting in the work
spk_0 Anyway guys, I just want to say thank you for coming into your session at the marriage counsellors corner
spk_0 Join me in the next episode where we're gonna talk about another very important topic that you don't want to miss out on
spk_0 Also, please remember visit our brand new website. I hope you like it. I hope it's beautiful
spk_0 I hope you can go through it and understand it much more seamlessly. I hope everything works out for you
spk_0 I want you to visit the website. I want you to go down scroll down a little bit on the homepage
spk_0 And I want you to sign up for our brand new
spk_0 Weekend marriage workshops. These are something that we're excited to
spk_0 You know offer the general public because people have been asking how can we work with you guys in this capacity?
spk_0 So now we finally open the doors. Okay, so I don't want you to delay in your registration
spk_0 Okay, cuz it's based off of first come first serve
spk_0 So only 30 couples can spend this time with us at first
spk_0 And then we'll expand it to more in our next couple. Okay, finally
spk_0 Finally, we are providing a resource that many of you have been requesting so go to
spk_0 mastering marriage institute.com that's mastering marriage institute.com to sign up today
spk_0 Also remember to subscribe to the podcast leave me an honest rating and review and I will thank you when you do that
spk_0 That way other individuals can have access to these episodes. Okay, and I'll greatly appreciate that
spk_0 anyways go out there and be smart be intentional stay out of trouble and I'll talk to you soon
spk_0 deuces
spk_0 Thanks for stopping by for your seat on the couch at the marriage counselors corner
spk_0 Remember go to marriagecouncerscorner.com to schedule your next session
spk_0 Also, don't forget to subscribe to this podcast so that you never miss a session
spk_0 We look forward to having you back on the couch soon. Bye bye now